


not a cloud in the sky, damn i love getting high

by mahariyuware



Category: Promare (2019)
Genre: Angst, Gen, Grief/Mourning, Hurt/Comfort, Lucia is hella emotionally mature, Recreational Drug Use, References to Depression, Surprisingly deep for a fic about smoking weed
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-04
Updated: 2020-05-04
Packaged: 2021-03-01 23:29:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,819
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23995309
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mahariyuware/pseuds/mahariyuware
Summary: Lio hits the bong and has an existential crisis. At least Lucia is there to help.
Relationships: Lio Fotia/Galo Thymos, Lucia Fex & Lio Fotia
Comments: 3
Kudos: 30





	not a cloud in the sky, damn i love getting high

**Author's Note:**

> What's up yall!! This is my first ever fanfic, so comments would be highly appreciated!! Hope you like it. Also thanks to silver for the beta <3

Lio knocked on the door to Lucia’s apartment.

“Coming!” she squeaked. When she opened the door, she looked different than usual, more casual. She was wearing a blue crop top (she had a thing for showing skin, apparently) and ripped denim shorts. Her hair was different as well: tied up into a single messy bun, a few pink strands framing her face. For all intents and purposes, Lucia looked ready to spend her day off smoking pot.

“Glad you could make it,” she said, flashing a sharp-toothed grin at him. “Come on in.”

She led the way inside. Not surprisingly, her apartment was a mess, paperwork strewn everywhere on the kitchen table among old takeout boxes and empty soda bottles. She had the parts to one of her projects laid out on the coffee table next to her sofa. “Lemme just get this shit outta the way,” she hummed, tossing her things on the floor unceremoniously. Lio gingerly took a seat on her sofa.

“I was surprised you contacted me, Lio,” she said. “I didn’t really expect you to want to smoke. I mean, I guess it makes sense since you were Burnish, but still.”

“Yeah,” Lio said. He didn’t really know what else to say. He wasn’t very close with Lucia, and didn’t necessarily feel like explaining himself. He bounced his leg nervously as she gathered her paraphernalia and plopped down next to him.

“Ah well,” she continued, grinding her weed. “I’m always happy to oblige. It can get kind of lonely here, and I’m always happy to have a smoking buddy.” 

“I’ll go first,” she said after she finished packing the bowl. “You just sit back and observe, buddy.” 

She brought the mouthpiece to her lips, the lighter to the bowl, and inhaled. Lio stared at the bubbles the motion produced. She let out a large exhale, smooth as butter, instantly visibly more relaxed.

After a few beats, she said, “Your turn?”

“Sure.”

“Here, you just hold it, I’ll light it for you, okay? You might cough a little but that’s normal.”

She passed it to him and he held it, his stomach churning with anticipation, his face pale.

Lucia seemed to pick up on his anxiety. “You’re okay, bud. Everybody’s nervous their first time, but it’s not bad, I promise. You ready?”

Lio gulped, and nodded. Somehow, after all he’s been through, this still managed to put a lump in his throat. 

She leaned over to light it, and he inhaled. Almost immediately, he broke away into a coughing fit. He watched Lucia stifle her laughter. 

“Like I said, that’s normal. Here, I’ll get you some water.” 

She returned in a minute with a cold glass, handed it to him, and watched him gulp it down. 

“It’s a little bit ironic,” he said once he recovered. “You would think I of all people would be able to handle a little bit of smoke.” 

“Yeah, I guess not, huh?” she snorted. “That’s okay. You’ll get there. You’ll be a pro in no time, just like the great Lucia.” She grinned. “Then people will be asking _you_ to get them high.” 

She took another rip from the bong, put her legs up on the coffee table, and blew the smoke out with a sigh. She reached for her TV remote and turned it on, flicking through the channels. 

“So really, Lio,” she said, studying him, her blue eyes already red around the edges. “Why are you here?” 

Lio sighed deeply. He knew this would come up at some point, but even so, it was uncomfortable as all hell. “I think I’m depressed, Lucia.” 

“Mmm,” she hummed. “Why?”

“It’s just,” he wrung his hands. “Ever since the Promare left, things have felt different. Colder, both figuratively and literally. I still help with Burnish recovery efforts, but I’m not the leader I once was.” 

“Ah.” She seemed to contemplate this as she passed him the bong. He took it, and she lit the bowl for him again while he took a hit. Again, he coughed, but not as bad as the first time. He felt his eyes and throat burning, and took another sip of his water. His heart was racing.

Lucia was uncharacteristically quiet. Maybe this was just how she was when high. 

“Have you told Galo you’re feeling this way?” she finally asked. 

“No. I’m scared of what he’ll say.” 

“Why?” she challenged. “You know he loves you more than anything, right? He’d do anything for you, Lio. You guys have been dating for a month now.” 

“Yeah,” he sighed. “I’ve told Gueira and Meis, at least. It’s easier talking to them, I guess. Easier for them to understand. I don’t want to worry Galo.” 

“You know that idiot’s going to worry anyway,” she said simply. She had settled on an episode of “How It’s Made” and her gaze was fixed on the TV, but Lio knew she was still paying attention to him. 

“One more hit,” Lio said, with some urgency now.

Lucia snickered, happy to oblige. This time, Lio exhaled nice and slow and watched the smoke, feeling a sense of nostalgia. 

“You miss it,” Lucia observed, fidgeting with the lighter. 

“Everyday,” he choked.

“Hey,” she said softly, placing her hand on his shoulder and squeezing it. “You’re okay. Do you want to talk about it?” She crossed her legs on the sofa and turned to face him to show he had her full attention. The weed had broken a barrier between the two of them and helped the words flow more easily. Now it felt almost as if they were best friends and could tell each other anything.

“I just — it’s lonely, Lucia. It’s so lonely.” He shook his head. “I always felt a sense of purpose before, a drive to burn. Now it’s like I don’t have a purpose and it’s like,” his voice got brittle towards the end, until he finally just stopped, burying his face in his hands.

Lucia was quiet for a bit, rubbing circles on his back. 

“You’ve got me. And Galo. And Meis and Gueira and all of Burning Rescue,” she said softly. “We’re all here for you and we’re glad to have you in our lives.” 

He didn’t respond, and Lucia noticed that he was trembling. Even though she was smaller than him, she wrapped her arms around him and tucked his head under her chin in a protective gesture, one hand in his hair, the other continuing to rub his back. She could feel him relax ever so slightly into her touch. 

They stayed quiet for a while, until his shaking and sobbing subsided. She gave him a final squeeze and leaned away.

“Tell you what. I _know_ you like Kraft Mac and Cheese,” she giggled. “I’ll make ya some. How’s that sound?”

“Good. I’m really fucking hungry,” he sighed.

She laughed and padded into the kitchen to prepare the gourmet. Lio sunk into the sofa further. After the crying spell, he noticed that he was a bit more relaxed. He felt that his senses were heightened. Lucia had the windows in her apartment opened a tad, and he could hear the sounds of birds chirping amidst the roar of rush hour traffic. The setting sun illuminated the apartment. Underneath the remnants of pot musk, he could smell Lucia’s apple cinnamon candle burning in the kitchen. Lucia’s walls were filled with pictures of her and her friends and what Lio assumed must be her as a kid with her parents. Her mechanical engineering degree from Promepolis University hung proudly in the kitchen, and a floral tapestry covered the back wall, lined with fairy lights. Lucia’s apartment was a mess, definitely, but at least it was a well-decorated mess, and Lio could appreciate that. 

“Is it normal for people to react this way when they get high?” he finally asked. 

“Sometimes!” she said, pouring the noodles in. “I’ve definitely had those kinda highs. Each high can be different.” 

“I see.” A beat. “I just thought this might help me relax a little bit. And you know … help me feel better about my lack of Promare.”

Lucia seemed to be lost in thought, her brows furrowed. She stirred the macaroni and then sat down again next to Lio. The look on her face surprised him: He usually never saw her serious. Even during an important mission, she tended to be silly and flippant. 

“Well, I can only speak to my own experiences. Obviously I was never Burnish, so I don’t know what you’re going through. But. I think I understand it to an extent. 

“When I was 15, my father died unexpectedly in a nasty car crash. We were close. My grief overwhelmed me and turned into depression. I guess that’s when I really started devoting myself to creating things. I didn’t really talk to anyone about how I was feeling because I didn’t know how to. 

“And then when I smoked weed for the first time when I was 17 it was just … amazing. It was like a weight had been lifted. Like any time I smoked I could escape my head. But that’s the _problem._ It’s not healthy to deal with things that way. Today I smoke because it’s fun, not because I feel like I have to do it to cope.”

Lio was quiet, studying her. She had just spilled a lot of deep thoughts, and he wished he knew how to thank her for her vulnerability and insight. Luckily, she talked again before he had time to form a response. 

“Lio, I think you’re grieving. It may not be a person that you lost, but it was something very close and important to you. And you’re grieving your old lifestyle. It’s hard to lose two important things like that at once.”

“Yeah.”

“I want you to get help, okay?” she said, squeezing his hand. “I can get you connected with a therapist. Would you be open to that?”

“Sure.”

“Okay.” She smiled. 

“Lucia?”

“Yes, Lio?” 

“You don’t really act like you’re high.”

She cackled. _“Really._ I’ve been smoking so long I guess all it does is chill me out a little bit. I know, I’m surprisingly coherent, it’s the benefit of being someone as smart as me.” She slapped him on the back, and he flinched slightly. “Lemme get your mac and cheese.” 

They ate mac and cheese at her kitchen island in a comfortable silence, which Lio only broke to tell Lucia how good it tasted, which was met with a laugh and, _Everything tastes good when you’re high, Lio._

“I should be getting home,” he said after their meal. 

“You want me to walk you home?”

“No, that’s okay.”

“Bitch, I’m walking you home. I’d worry about you out stumbling the streets of Promepolis.”

He rolled his eyes. “Fine then ... but Lucia? Thank you for everything today.”

“Anytime, nerd,” she replied, grinning. “Anytime.” 

  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> thanks for making it to the end!! follow me on twitter if ya want :) @mahariiyuware


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